Cancer Contrarian

Most of my day yesterday was focused on cooking.  A good friend lost his wife to cancer, so I wanted to contribute to the Meal Train supporting him while he grieves.  I figured if I was going to fire up the oven, the grill and the stovetop, I would also bank some good, reheatable food in our refrigerator as well.

I made three pounds of beef and pork meatballs, grilled three pounds of chicken thighs, roasted five pounds of Yukon gold potatoes, four crowns of broccoli, cooked a pound of cheese tortellini and made a sauce with cherry tomatoes, garlic, and those teeny tiny little summer squash, plus fresh basil.  I also made a batch of my favorite rice pudding recipe, with orange zest, vanilla and dried cherries.

As I cooked, I thought of my friend and his sweet wife.  I noted that the food I was making hit every note:  Sweet, Salty, Bitter, Sour, Savory.  Driving home from the grocery store, I saw the signs notifying the community that the Pelotonia charity bike ride would be coming through town next weekend.

I have nothing against Pelotonia, but I have never felt drawn to participate in it.  Structurally, I think it is genius.  It’s a great outlet for so many of us who are affected by the disease.  When I lost my dad to lung cancer in 2008, I started training for my first marathon.  It could have just as easily been a long bike trek.  Long training runs were a way to reflect on my loss, and a vain attempt to outrun the grim reaper by becoming as healthy and robust as possible.  

When stomach cancer took my mom’s life, I still did not feel called to saddle up and join the peloton.  Something about it repels me.  Maybe I’m reluctant to re-engage with grief that I have mostly put behind me.  At least part of my resistance is distrust of distracted drivers who might plow me over during training rides.

So many people that I know ride in the event.  I can’t possibly give each of them a meaningful donation.  Instead, I cook food for my friend, another person suffering the loss of a loved one due to cancer.  We all have our roles to play.

Sunday Supper
These Grilled Chicken Thighs w/ Lime-Basil Butter are a perfect summer recipe.  And this recipe for Salt & Pepper Zucchini is a great use of this prolific ingredient.  With peaches just about to peak, this Fruit Galette recipe would be good to have on hand.

Sunday Music
This hour-long video featuring Sheryl Crow and Jason Isbell in conversation and performance at The Metropolitan Museum of Art is wonderful.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please share it with them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Interesting Times

There is a backhanded curse that has been attributed to Chinese culture, but for which there is no evidence of it coming from the Chinese:  May you live in interesting times.

I think this moment in America’s story will qualify as “interesting” to future historians.

From my perspective, life has been a surreal mix of normal, mundane everyday things with the occasional unbelievable, one-off, never-in-my-life type national events.

Like last weekend – Donald Trump dodged a bullet, but so did America. I am not a supporter of Trump, but cannot see how his assassination would yield anything positive.

All the drama on the political scene, while at the same time I’m in the throes of emptynesterhood where I can set and maintain my own routine in ways I probably never have…these things merge into interestingness.  Some things I don’t want to share.  Personal stuff, family stuff.  We have a lot on our plate right now.  But we’re so fortunate.  We have the bandwidth to take on such challenges as they arise.

But mortality looms, ever closer, hovering more and more in conscious thought. I want to make the most of the days that I have left, but continue to defer certain things into the future on the assumption that I will be robust enough to engage with them then. I see all too often people making these same deferrals, only to run out of time.

So it’s a bit weird. Not good, not bad. Just weird. Each presidential cycle, It feels like America holds its breath a bit. Everyone waits to see how it turns out. People don’t make big ticket purchases, employers don’t hire quite as fast. We’re all in wait-and-see mode.

There are still quite a few things on my to-do list. I’m optimistic that I’ll get to most of them before my time runs out. For now, I’m going to savor this beautiful weather we’re having, go to the farmers market and buy the freshest produce I can get my hands on and cook something good to eat. That’s never a bad idea.

A new television series just dropped on Apple+ right now - Omnivore, produced by and featuring René Redzepi, famed chef of three-Michelin starred restaurant, Noma, in Copenhagen, Denmark.  It offers a deep dive into specific ingredients that I have found compelling.  The first two episodes (the ones I have watched thus far) focus on chile peppers and tuna.  This program is reminiscent of David Attenborough’s Planet Earth, but focused on food.  It is well worth a watch.

Also, we lost one of our greatest comedians this past week.  Bob Newhart died Thursday at the ripe old age of 94.  This brief video he made for his friend Don Rickles’ birthday displays his unique style - and a sharpness he retained late into life.

Sunday Supper
We are entering peak season at the farmer’s market.  I made the most delicious, simplest little caprese salad on Saturday, using produce from Bird's Haven Farms.  There is nothing better.  If you want something more involved, try these Grilled Pork Chops with Dill Pickle Butter.  These Chorizo-Stuffed Zucchini Boats are a great way to start using those larger Zukes that are starting to appear.  This Thai Corn Salad w/ Salted Duck Egg looks very interesting.

Sunday Music
I discovered Paolo Nutini this week.  Check him out.  And the jam band Phish (finally) made its way to the NPR Tiny Desk for a performance.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please share it with them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Kinfolk

As I locked the door to the house Friday afternoon, my mind was reviewing the many tasks I could accomplish if stayed home instead of traveling.  As I often do before going on a long drive, a piece of me fretted about unforeseeable traffic snarls and any other bogeyman that my irrational mind could muster.  Status quo and routine tried to drag me down like quicksand.

But this was on my calendar, and if something makes it onto my calendar it gets done.  So I hit the road.  I’d been to this part of the world so rarely these last few years, I was not 100% certain of the route to the lone road that climbs the mountain where my aunt, uncles, and cousins have lived for as many years as I’ve drawn breath.  I saw enough familiar buildings to know I was getting close.  But it took a quick stop in the parking lot of a Dairy Queen that allowed me to confirm the final leg of the journey with my aunt.

By 7pm I was eating tacos and catching up with my dear aunt Rachel.  Uncle Paul arrived an hour or so later, and we talked past my normal bedtime on all sort of family issues.  I slept hard, waking at sunrise, despite the blackout shades.  My body just knows it’s time to get up…

Rachel prepped a blackberry pie and popped it in the oven, a critical menu item for later in the day.  Then she made breakfast for Paul and me.  Paul and I watched the Scottish Open on TV, then assembled and loaded a new incubator he bought to hatch some fertilized chicken eggs.  Rachel continued prepping lunch.  

By midday, the first batch of cousins and their children arrived, the second batch appeared soon thereafter.  EIGHT glorious young ones, the next generation of the family tree, hugging, running, playing.  Just like I used to do, on this same mountain. 

It was lunchtime.  The stove held a big pot of pinto beans, another with sauerkraut and hot dogs in it, a large cast iron pan of fried potatoes, and another with a proper batch of cornbread.  So simple.  So well-executed.  So many sense memories.

Rachel made up a plate and took it down the road to the birthday boy.  Everybody enjoyed lunch.  The kids went back to playing.  I shuffled down the road to see the birthday boy myself.  He was sitting on his porch.  I know he is my uncle, but when he speaks I hear my grandfather.  I know he is my uncle, but when he speaks I hear my mother.  We talked about his beautiful grandbabies.  We talked about his health.  We talked about all the things different doctors have been telling him.  I told him I loved him.

My cousin put the birthday candles on the blackberry pie, and we sang Happy Birthday to her daddy.  The pie was heaven.  The kids went back outside to play.  I watched the Orioles/Yankees game, basking in the afterglow of the perfect Mountain Meal.  Rachel took the grandbabies for a ride in the 4x4.

When she returned, I said my goodbyes and hit the road for home.  I drove down the mountain with the windows down, breathing in the air.  I smelled sweet scents, and I smelled something foul.  It was all beautiful.  I saw perhaps three cars before I got close to the highway.

Mom’s gone, but her family is there, where they’ve always been.  And I’m a part of it.  How glorious that is.

Sunday Supper
This Sunday I won’t have as much time to prep food, so I might make just a big batch of this Bolognese Sauce to pair with some pasta or chopped, roasted cauliflower for my gluten-free gal.  Or, I may grill up a bunch of these Spicy Lamb Burgers w/ Tahini.  This Zucchini Salad w/ Basil, Mint, and Feta looks good.  So does this Corn Salad with Tomatoes, Feta and Mint.

Sunday Music
Check out this group I recently discovered from Lincoln, Nebraska - The Wildwoods, singing their song, West Virginia Rain.  And here’s the Punch Brothers’ NPR Tiny Desk concert from about nine years ago.   Enjoy! 

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please share it with them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Shared Space

It’s been a classic July 4th holiday week here in Granville, Ohio.  We shut down the main drag and host a festival every year, with games, rides, fried foods, music - the whole shebang.  The event draws people from all over the area.  I love the energy of it, and often find myself entranced by people watching.  We humans have such range.  We are all so different.  The truth of this smacks me in the face when I find myself sharing space with people from outside my bubble.  That bubble has shrunk considerably in the last few years.  

It grew and grew after graduating high school.  First were the college classmates, then the co-workers, neighbors, and the families whose children were in the same grades as ours.  New nodes of social network sprouted up continuously.  Since our youngest child graduated high school in 2021, the network quickly contracted.  No more soccer games or choir concerts, fewer and fewer graduation parties.  Fewer pets, even. (Lori and I are observing a non-replacement policy as our pets exit the stage, preparation for a future time when we can travel unfettered by pet care concerns.)  Mom left us.

COVID put a rather lengthy kibosh on interaction.  This probably skews my perception.  But Amazon has also been a real force in reducing the amount of human interaction many of us experience.  Rather than mingling with our fellow humans at brick-and-mortar retailers, we point and click on our computers, then wait for things to appear on our doorsteps.  This reduction in physical interaction, coupled with the hyper-fragmentation of media…no wonder things have become so tribal, so polarized.  There are fewer and fewer “water cooler” moments to unify us.  

I think this is less true in the more densely populated cities - especially those with robust public transportation options.  If you ride the subways of New York City, in one day you will share space with a wide array of people - spanning numerous religious faiths, political leanings, skin tones, countries of origin…people who are vastly more different than the folks walking the midway at the July 4th festival this week.  Yet they seem to be more tolerant of each other.  I think it is because they share space more often.

There once was a day when our elected officials were collegial with one another, at least when they weren’t debating topics on the floors of their respective legislative bodies.  They were able to vigorously disagree on matters of policy, then break bread in the Capitol cafeteria, or exercise with each other in the Congressional fitness center.  Not so much today…

I think we need to spend more time together.  Not to necessarily hash out anything specifically.  Just to be together.  I’m not exactly sure how to make this happen, but it’s not hard to imagine food playing a role in whatever ideas I might muster.  Let’s think on this, and then take action out in the real world.

Sunday Supper
I’ll be making this Rosemary Chicken and Peach Salad later today.  These Spicy Tuna and Avocado Tostadas look amazing, too.

Sunday Music
This live performance by Norah Jones with The Handsome Band in August, 2018, is a great listen this Sunday.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please share it with them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Least Worst

The buzz since Thursday has been all about the performance of the two presumptive candidates for President in Thursday night’s debate.  It is the nature of punditry to criticize, and there has been no shortage of criticism.  While the country is far from unanimous regarding which candidate would be the better person to serve in this important role for the next four years, there does seem to be consensus that these two candidates are reflective of a system in need of improvement.

We don't need to look far for a simple idea that could make a positive impact.  Businessperson-turned-politician Andrew Yang has been advocating for a shift to Ranked Choice Voting.  Here is how it would work for a single-winner election like the U.S. Presidency:

1. Voters rank the candidates according to their personal preference (1st, 2nd, 3rd, etc.)

2. If a candidate wins an outright majority of first-preference votes, they win the election.

3. If no candidate wins an outright majority of first-preference votes, the candidate with the fewest first-preference votes is eliminated from the race, and the second-preferences of those ballots are then treated as first-preference votes.

4. A new tally is conducted in similar fashion until one candidate accumulates a majority of votes.

This approach would create a friendlier environment for voters to support 3rd party options.  Under the status quo, voting for 3rd party candidates is often viewed as “wasting” one’s vote.  Such candidates very rarely win an election, but their involvement in the process is often cited as playing a “spoiler” role for one of the two major party candidates.  With ranked choice voting, citizens can “vote their heart” safe in the knowledge that if they vote for an up-and-coming outsider that falls short of a majority, their 2nd preference will be honored if a re-tally is necessary.

This is a simple idea that would likely open up the political process to more candidates.  And if we believe anything in America, we tend to believe in the power of competition to increase the quality of available options.

Our political system is controlled by two parties, and they have no interest in creating a broader menu of options for voters. On this point, they are aligned with each other, and at odds with our broader collective interests.

Along with Death and Taxes, being forced to choose the least-worst candidate from a two-person race for President seems to be inevitable.  As such, I’m going to go to the polls, cast my vote and hope.  I hope all registered voters do the same.  As flawed as our system is, it is diminished further when we decide to not participate in it.

Have a safe and fun Independence Day!

Sunday Supper
If you are looking for some interesting grillables for the upcoming holiday, The Butcher & Grocer in Grandview Heights comes highly recommended.  This Carne Asada is a classic grilling option, as are these Tarragon-Mustard Chicken Skewers.  Quadruple Chile Cheeseburgers are an interesting way to go the extra mile this holiday week.  This Italian-American Pasta Salad looks fantastic, and you can’t go wrong with a Classic Cole Slaw or this Smoked Salmon Potato Salad.  

Sunday Music
Here is the storied Canadian band Rush, performing their classic, Freewill.  They Might Be Giants played a wonderfully stripped down set at NPR’s Tiny Desk twelve years ago.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please share it with them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Heck Yeah

Don’t you just love the new terms that arise out of meteorology?  Back in my day, this heat wave we’ve been experiencing would have been called just that - a “heat wave.”  But now we’re calling it a “heat dome.”  Okey dokey…. I’m feeling a little cranky, reminiscent of that famous crank, Andy Rooney.  Maybe it’s the heat affecting me.

I found myself thinking about how, as we age, we achieve this exalted status of having “Zero Fucks To Give.”  (This newsletter does occasionally allow cursing, but for the remainder of this essay all “fucks” will be converted into “hecks.”)

So, where do all the hecks go?

Many are lost as we accumulate wealth.  “Heck You Money” is the ultimate manifestation of this concept.  (If you ever read an essay from me that fails to translate curse words into tamer terms, you will know I have hit some sort of financial jackpot.). With each Zestimate emailed to be by Zillow, my heck count falls.  Years of paying our mortgage, combined with Intel’s arrival driving up home values has me feeling pretty good about my low-interest note and fast-growing equity in the house.  So, there is probably an inverse relationship between financial security and heck count.

Having kids has driven down many of my hecks.  Watching them grow up, enduring the status games of youth - and then noticing those same games being played by adults all around us.  It helped me to better see them for what they are, and respond accordingly.

Losing my parents definitely contributed to a steep decline in hecks for me.  Having a front-row seat to both of their exits has offered a special perspective - almost everything they ever cared about or worried about was rendered absolutely irrelevant when compared to mortality.  But this was more than a vicarious absorption of truth.  My dying parents exposed me to stresses that forced me to be brutally honest with myself about my priorities.  The emotional and physical energy expended required me to limit all other activities to just the essentials.  So I ended up learning what could wait…sometimes forever.

And that is when the last few hecks flutter off into the breeze.  When one really, truly appreciates just how brief life is, they just take off like butterflies. 

This doesn’t mean that I don’t care about anything.  It just means that my cares are hyper-focused on the precious few things that truly matter.  Lifting people up.  Laughing.  Eating well, nurturing others.  Setting a good example (my modest attempt at showing my fellow humans what I consider to be game theory optimal behavior for maximizing our time here on earth).  

Having no hecks is not the same thing as having a license to be an ass.  Being an ass has consequences, at least some of the time.  If my life is better lived by ignoring an ass, this is my preferred response.  But if compelled to engage, oof.  One must always avoid getting into a contest to establish who is the bigger ass with a heck-free elder.

Stay cool, my friend.

Sunday Supper
I’m leaning into cool salads this week.  No need to heat up the kitchen too much, or swelter over the grill.  This North African Tuna and Rice salad fits the bill.  So does this Thai Beef Salad.    This Smashed Zucchini w/ Chickpeas and Peanuts seems interesting, as well.

Sunday Music
This tune from Mr. Thomas Benjamin Wild, Esq. fits today’s theme quite nicely (though he does not translate the “F” word into “heck”).  This new tune from Lake Street Dive resonates.  And this set from the great Chaka Khan at the NPR Tiny Desk is fantastic - enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please share it with them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Dad Bod

Happy Father’s Day!  As a golf fan, it’s always one of my favorite days of the year.  The final round of the Men’s U.S. Open golf championship always falls on this day.

Lori has been spending more time with her father lately, which meant I drove solo to Durham last weekend to help our son move into a new apartment.  I went down on a Friday, returning to Ohio the following Sunday, and working hard almost every moment in between.  The year prior, our entire family of four moved him in to the previous place.  This time it was just the two of us.

My back hasn’t been 100% lately, and I was worried how it would hold up.  We got the keys to the new place at 10am Saturday, and was eating takeout Indian food for dinner at 10pm before hitting the hay.  In the interim, we relocated all of his belongings and completely cleaned the old apartment, handing the keys back to the landlady after a walkthrough.  

I felt surprisingly good when I woke up Sunday morning.  A preventative dose of Aleve plus daily yoga did the trick (not to mention regular visits to Always Forward CrossFit).  A quick trip to Target Sunday morning for some sundries, then we loaded up the car with things the lad wanted to send home and I hit the road back to Ohio.

At some point doing all this work on Saturday, I could feel my body moving much the same as my dad’s did when he helped me with big, physically challenging tasks.  It was uncanny - not exactly that I had become my father.  Just that I knew exactly what it felt like to be him, back when he toiled with me on various projects.   Like when we moved dirt in the backyard - with shovels, by hand, to create a level spot on which to build the boy’s play set.  Or when we re-roofed the house not long after moving to Granville.

Physical labor was no stranger to my dad.  I felt so close to him that day - and to Henry.  How many times will I have him all to myself again?  For him, it was a day of hard work,  accomplishing a big task.  It’s impossible for him to know how special it was to me.  Maybe some day he’ll have his own weird I’ve-become-my-father-deja-vu moment.

I see a chiropractor on a regular basis - something my father never did.  Knowing how my body feels today with regular back adjustments, it’s hard to imagine what dad’s in-body experience must have been.  He was a tough old man.  

Sunday Supper
For Sunday Supper today, these Garlic Butter Steak Bites are very dad-friendly, as are these French Onion Sliders.  Southern Fried Corn and Lemon-Garlic Kale Salad round things out.

Sunday Music
This Progressive House Mix will have your booty shaking today - let it rip!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Ingredient House

I had the good fortune to re-connect with a long-time friend this past week.  He is someone for whom I have a ton of respect and affection.  Circumstances are such that we don’t organically cross paths as much as we used to, so it’s extra refreshing when we talk.

Since it had been a while, he asked me how the meal kit business was doing.  I told him that we shut it down, for lack of product/market fit - both with grocers and consumers.  I said that I believed too few people actually want to cook - even if the ingredients are prepped and assembled in convenient kit form.  

He remarked that his kids once told him that when they went off to college, they learned that they grew up in an “ingredient house,” meaning a house that actually stocked basic ingredients for cooking - spices, grains, flour, etc.  “Ingredient House.”  Such a term would never occur to me, though I definitely grew up in one (we just called it a “house”). Clearly Lori and I raised our children in an Ingredient House.  What a kick it is to receive a photo of something one of the lads has cooked (this happens regularly)!

The existence of Ingredient Houses implies the parallel existence of…what?  “Food Houses?” “Prepared Food Houses?”  “Restaurant Houses?”  Maybe…I remember our next door neighbors going out to eat a lot more than we did when I was growing up.

You’ve heard me evangelize home cooking enough, so there’s no need to get back on that particular soap box.  I’m glad to have a new term in my quiver, though.

Every home contains ingredients - maybe not nutritional components, but perhaps the building blocks for intellectual, creative or spiritual development.  It’s a good practice to ask “What are the ingredients in this house?  What are we developing here?”  Whether by design or by default, we are always building something.

Sunday Supper
FYI - I cooked the Korean Fried Chicken in last week’s Sunday Supper recommendations, and it was fantastic!  This week I offer the following ideas for dinner tonight, or to prep for the week ahead:  This Roasted Eggplant w/ Tahini, Pine Nuts and Lentils looks wonderful.  Tri-Tip Beef Roast w/ Shallot Jus would be great (I love the taste and texture of the tri-tip).  Slicing some beef and topping this Brussels Sprouts w/ Lemon Vinaigrette with it would make for a great entree salad.

Sunday Music
I am pleased to share the 2024 NPR Tiny Desk Contest Winner:  The Philharmonik.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Critical Judgment

What a wonderful stretch of weather we’ve had this past week.  The Granville Farmer’s Market was bustling with sunshine and customers yesterday.  There’s rain in the forecast, which our farmers will appreciate.

Unless you are on a “news fast” you are probably aware that a Manhattan jury convicted Donald Trump on 34 counts of falsifying records to cover up a sex scandal during his 2016 presidential campaign.  The trial and its result has reporters, analysts and opinion writers offering their two cents on it all.  From the fairness of the proceedings, to the likelihood of a successful appeal, to the political implications, there is no shortage of views being expressed - and everyone assigns different weights to the significance of different aspects of the story.  Only time will tell what this all means for Trump legally, politically and in the historical record.

It highlights a topic I have previously written about - the importance for all of us to strengthen our powers of critical thinking.  In the olden days of my youth, the mainstream media served as a curator of information, simplifying the framing of the news of the day.  I believe this made it a bit easier to be an informed citizen, but it also put the media in a position of unique power in terms of “setting the table” for what society focused on, discussed and debated.

In today’s internet-based world, the number of news outlets has exploded, as have individuals and groups who are “news adjacent” or “newsish.”  They look and talk like news reporters, offering their opinions without generating ground-level sourcing of information.  As individuals we are left to sort through the hard news, the opinions and even bad faith misinformation that flows freely across this frictionless, digital landscape right into our eyes and ears.

This drives home for me a simple thesis - those who wish to thrive in the future need to have better critical thinking skills than what was required in the past.  I am cautiously optimistic that we will all become better thinkers in the long run as a result of this technology-enabled explosion of information.

One reason for this optimism is that the world typically provides a strong feedback loop.  I’ve written about this in the past, but it remains a good example - the January 6th rioters put their faith in information sources that turned out to be mostly incorrect.  Now they are paying a steep price for that reliance.  I imagine these people will discount the quality of those information sources in the future, if they consider them at all.  In the last two U.S. Presidential election cycles, we have had the ability to see how both of this year’s candidates has performed in our highest office.  Those observations will inform how we vote in this cycle.

A second reason for my optimism is, perhaps ironically, technology.  The same technology that inundates us with more information than we can possibly process is training us to be more discerning - and making it possible to disrupt the ways that we teach and learn.  

Our education system is ripe for this type of disruption.  I can see a future where students of different learning styles can be taught in ways that are best suited for them.  Our brightest minds will go further, and faster, because they no longer will be held back by curriculum designed for the majority.  This mass customization of teaching will lift up both the ceiling and the floor of our human potential.  Everyone will have access to the best subject matter experts on any topic, delivered in ways that are best for their individual learning styles.

So, is Donald Trump the victim of a baseless political prosecution, or someone who ran afoul of the law and has been held to account by our judicial system?  We must each decide for ourselves.  It will be very interesting to see how it all plays out.

Sunday Supper
I cooked many of this week’s Sunday Supper recommendations for a special meal with friends last weekend.  This Roasted Salmon w/ Ginger-Lime Butter was wonderful, as was this Shredded Brussels Sprouts Salad w/ Miso Dressing.  For dessert, I made these Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop Tarts w/ a scoop of Jeni’s vanilla ice cream.  On my radar for the week ahead is this Korean Fried Chicken recipe, which is receiving a lot of positive reviews.

Sunday Music
This Sunday I am pleased to share with you this hour-long set of improvised electronic music created by the amazing Reggie Watts.  His talent for blending humor with music always puts a smile on my face.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Enter The Danger

This headline in the New York Times this past week struck me: “The Best Sex Advice Might Also Be The Hardest To Follow.  Some couples would rather get divorced than talk openly about their intimate lives.”  Here is a link to the article.

The starkness of the statement, and the fact that I found it unsurprising were both noteworthy.  My first thought after reading it was “If long-term loving couples can’t talk about sensitive topics, what hope do leadership teams in businesses have?”

Some keys to organizational health that we promote as EOS Implementers are Openness, Honesty, and Vulnerability.  Real people, talking about real things that really matter.  Our work often involves creating a more secure context within which these sensitive conversations can take place (sometimes for the first time).

In the Times article, a therapist named Cyndi Darnell is quoted as saying “talking about sex is awkward - which is especially true if you’ve spent months or years avoiding it.”  EOS Implementers are trained to “enter the danger,” to recognize the things in the session room that are going unsaid, and help clients examine sensitive topics.  As fraught as this can feel, these are the conversations that often yield great value.  Successfully engaging in sensitive discussions and safely coming out the other side of them builds a capability that exists in too few business teams.  The team that can discuss anything is a team to be reckoned with.

Again referencing the article, therapist Jeffrey Chernin says “One of the things I often say to couples who are having trouble is:  ‘I wish there was another way through this,’” he said.  “But the only way I know to have a better sex life, or to resume your sex life, is to discuss it.”  As Ryan Holiday so aptly puts it:  The only way out, is through.  In order to have the lives and businesses that we want, we have to explore awkward, personal, and sensitive topics sometimes.

A first step that is always available to us is to put ourselves out there, modeling the behavior that we wish to see from others.  To take full ownership of our experiences, and be willing to say “This isn’t working for me, here is what I think I need.  What do you think about this?  How does it make you feel?”

So often we get wrapped around our own axles.  Delaying and deferring the sensitive conversation only compounds the awkwardness of it when it can no longer be avoided.  But once we actually engage with the issues, there is great relief and growth to be enjoyed on the other side of these conversations.

So, enter the danger.  It will likely not be as bad as you fear.  And it has the potential to strengthen the relationships of those involved.

Sunday Supper
Some ideas to consider for Memorial Day cookouts - this Michelada Chicken looks yummy, as do these Memphis Dry-Rub Ribs.  This Creamy Cucumber Salad would pair well with each, as would this Snap Pea Salad w/ Mint and Tahini-Harissa dressing.  For a sweet finish, it’s hard to beat Lemon Bars, or these Grill-Baked Smoked Ancho Chile Skillet Brownies.

Sunday Music
Singer/songwriter Maggie Rogers was interviewed on Fresh Air this week.  What a lovely, creative person.  Here is a recent performance she gave on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, and another on BBC Radio.  Lastly, here she is performing in 2018 on Saturday Night Live.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Evening, Beirut

I’ve never actually called the restaurant to order takeout, because I don’t live in Toledo.  But my friend Peter does a hilarious impression of how the phone is answered at the restaurant:  “Evening, Beirut.”  Two simple words, uttered with a Lebanese accent.

The Beirut, at 4082 Monroe Street in Toledo, Ohio is my favorite restaurant.  Period.  And it always will be.  It achieved this high status in my personal pecking order by virtue of many things.  

The first, of course, is by consistently producing delicious food.  So fresh, so good.  Lots of vegetables.  Overeating at The Beirut is nearly impossible to avoid, because everything is so delicious, and healthy to boot.  When dining at The Beirut, to quote comedian Louis CK, “The meal isn’t over when I’m full.  It’s over when I hate myself.”  Whatever self-criticism I levy for my gluttony, it’s always done as a compliment to the restaurant.  “Ah, Beirut…you got me again…”

I first visited the restaurant with Peter during the summer of 1989, if I recall correctly.  It was my first time eating Lebanese food.  It was probably my first exposure to tahini, and za’atar.  As I tasted each item, I remember thinking “This is good, but different…”  It was just different enough for me to go “huh…”. When we saw Peter’s dad and stepmom outside Ohio Stadium before a football game later that Fall, they had brought down lots of food from The Beirut to enjoy while tailgating.  Tasting it all that second time felt like a homecoming for my taste buds.  From that point forward, those flavor combinations and textures became hard-coded in my sense memory.

The restaurant was an early point of common connection when Lori and I started dating.  She had gone to grad school in Toledo, and The Beirut was her favorite restaurant, too.  It has become a touchstone for our closest friends and family - most of the most special people in our lives have made the pilgrimage to The Beirut, experienced it’s glory, embracing it as one of their top culinary experiences as well.

I can’t ignore the possibility that timing may be a factor in how strong my affection for The Beirut is.  All sorts of experiences from early adulthood seem to hold high significance.  The Beirut is like another one of my college friends, people with whom I’m still close today.  Experiences with them are etched just a little more deeply into my synapses.

I had an all-day meeting in Detroit this past Friday.  Afterward I drove to Toledo and dined yet again at The Beirut with Peter and his fiancé.  It was glorious.  If I could go there as often as I wanted, I wonder how often I would go.  Is it even possible to grow weary of that menu?  I'm sure I would test the limit.  I could probably order more reasonably, safe in the knowledge that I could return tomorrow.

If you ever have the chance to go there, do so!  I hope that you have a restaurant that means as much to you as The Beirut means to me.

Sunday Supper
This Sunday I’ll be prepping these Korean Beef Bulgogi Burritos and Kung Pao Chicken to jump start the week with some healthy, delicious meat and vegetables.

Sunday Music
This NPR Tiny Desk concert featuring Brazilian singer Luciana Souza swings!  And this performance by Yasser Tejedaprovides a perfect complement to Souza this weekend.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Running On Empty

DISCLAIMER:  I am not a doctor.  This post is simply sharing what I have experienced this year as I have implemented changes in the way I feed myself, with the goal of losing weight.  What I share here should not be construed as advice.

When I returned home from Fort Worth on January 4th, I stepped on the scale and weighed 239 pounds.  Yesterday the scale read 222.6 pounds.  This change has come about by virtue of me following three simple rules:

1. Minimize sugar intake.
2. Cook your own food.
3. Consume all daily calories within an 8-hour window of time each day.

Past attempts at weight loss had me weighing the food that I ate, counting calories, logging specific brands and products into smartphone apps…the administrative demands alone doomed these efforts for me.  Let alone the negative self-talk I would experience as I entered food items into the journal that I “shouldn’t” be eating.

This latest effort, with its simple rubric that requires no such tracking has resulted in the most consistent downward trend in body weight that I have ever experienced.  I think it is the simplicity that has helped me stick with it.  

Yes, I am exercising too - but I’ve done this consistently for years, while slowly gaining weight.  I know it sounds like an oversimplification, but weight loss/gain is truly a basic function of calories in versus calories out.  Mastering the diet is truly the last piece of the fitness puzzle for me.  I won’t say that I have achieved mastery yet, but definitely feel that I am on the right path.  Time will tell.

Some key takeaways:

• Food tastes extra good when I’m hungry.

• I sleep better on an empty stomach.  The extra energy I have each day was an unexpected bonus.

• My “bad” days are fewer, and sometimes planned.  I’ll extend a fast to “pre-pay” for an indulgent meal, and even when I simply deviate from the rubric, I’ve been able to "get back on the horse" quickly, rather than regressing to my previous norms.

• Hunger & emptiness aren't the same.  Honoring a 16-hour fast has not required me to feel hungry to the point of distraction very often.  For one thing, I’m asleep for at least half of the fasting period.  Secondly, I have come to appreciate the empty feeling I experience mid-morning, near the end of the fast.

My three simple rules have a bit of nuance baked into them (e.g. home-cooking means eating less processed foods), but essentially they distill down to the notion of skipping a meal, everyday, in order to lose weight.  

So much disease in America is driven by abundance and convenience.  Introducing a little scarcity into my life has increased my health.  My target weight is 210 pounds, which is 29 pounds lighter than I started the year.  We’ll see if I get there, and how well I maintain that weight once it is achieved.  I’ll keep you posted.

Sunday Supper
These Slow-Cooker Sticky Thai Meatballs look wonderful, and pair well with this Malaysian Coconut Rice.  This Asian Vegetable Stir Fry rounds the meal out nicely.

Sunday Music
Daryl Hall of Hall & Oates fame has his own show on YouTube called Live From Daryl's House.  In this episode, he plays a wonderful set of songs with the great Ben Folds.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Looks Easy

Cloudy, wet weather has settled in over the Land of Legend.  Thankfully (so far, at least) the rain has taken numerous breaks, allowing us to get Nova outside regularly.  We even completed our first full lap of our regular walking route, about six weeks post-surgery.  She handled it well, but I’m mindful of not overdoing things.  She’s still healing.

Both the outdoor Farmers Market and the Thursday Night Men’s Golf League kicked off this week.  I’m thankful for both, seeing lots of friendly faces that I somehow only run into at either venue.  Let the summer begin.

I reflected a bit this week on how some people make hard things look easy.  How Steph Curry shoots a basketball.  How Tiger Woods hits a golf ball.  The investment results that Warren Buffet consistently achieves.  Heck, even something domestic like yard/landscape maintenance - some of our neighbors make this look easy.

But we know it is not.  How do those of us who have developed excellence at something do it?  First and probably foremost, they are consistent.  How many practice shots does Steph or Tiger take, every day?  How many annual reports and SEC filings does Warren Buffet read, every single day?  How many days off do the people with immaculate yards take?  Not very many…. So, consistency is key.

One way to achieve consistency is to imagine your daily behavior as a type of investment account.  Most of the things we do each day serve the present moment.  Much of today is about meeting the needs of today.  In order to achieve meaningful long-term excellence, some percentage of each day must involve behaviors that are future-focused.  

One does not achieve a 10-year goal by simply saying it aloud.  We must translate that long-term goal into daily behaviors, daily baby steps.  We tiptoe our way to excellence.  We manifest it in increments.  We can die from 1,000 cuts - but it works in reverse, too.  Building a meaningful life by virtue of 1,000 small actions.  Or 10,000, or 1,000,000. 

The famed former UCLA basketball coach John Wooden, at the first practice of each new season, would take the time to explain to his players how to properly tie their shoes.  The message:  The fundamentals matter.  Little things add up.  

Be mindful of the behaviors you engage in, devote some of them every day to your long-term goals, and always ask whether they are taking you closer to your dreams.

Sunday Supper
Here is what I’m cooking today that will serve as supper tonight, with plenty of leftovers to start the week ahead.  First, in honor of Cinco de Mayo, let’s make some Red Chicken Posole.  This slow-cooker Honey/Soy Braised Pork with Lime & Ginger looks good, too.  Lastly, this Smokehouse Chickpeas & Greens Salad will round things out.

Sunday Music
The 2024 New Orleans Jazz & Heritage Festival wrapped up this week.  Here is John Batiste performing I Need You.  And here is the Tedeschi Trucks Band performing “Palace Of The King” with famed ZZ Top guitarist Billy Gibbons.  Lastly, this NPR Tiny Desk concert by Willow is a very nice way to round out the music offerings this week.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Writing Your Obituary

My body and brain is buzzing, the aftereffects of a day spent outside working in the yard, taking a hot shower, and drinking a couple of glasses of some really delicious sparkling wine that a friend recently gifted us.

Kevin Kelly, founding editor of Wired magazine, recently turned 73 years old.  As is his habit, he updated his list of advice - things learned from a life well-lived.  Things that he thinks might benefit people, especially if they could learn them a bit sooner than he did.  I was introduced to Kevin when he was a guest on the Tim Ferriss Show, one of my favorite podcasts.  I really appreciate his perspective, both because he is very thoughtful and because he is further down the path of life than me.

Kevin comes off as very likable, and intelligent.  I think you will find all of his tidbits worthy of consideration.  One item particularly jumped out at me - the notion of writing our own obituary.  I think this is a great exercise for everyone to do.

Writing your obituary as you would want it to read is an effective way to cut to the chase - what do you really want people to be able to say about you, unprompted, when your life is over?  If you died right now, what do you think people would say?  

This thought experiment strips away all of the B.S.  It creates the conditions for a real, honest assessment of where things currently stand, what is possible, and what is most important in this finite thing we call life.

Although we know it is finite, life is also indefinite - we typically don’t know where the end point is.  This indefiniteness allows us to kick the can down the road.  I urge you to reject this procrastination.  If you haven’t already done so, I think you will find it liberating to imagine you are gone, and write the obituary you would want to be true for you.

While you’re at it, you should pull together all of your user names and passwords, account numbers, etc., etc. - make it easy on your family to access all of the important stuff that you manage.  I have done this, and it needs a regular review and refresh - passwords are always changing, 2-factor authentication, etc.

If we do this properly, our last check (to the funeral home) will just barely clear our bank account, and our families can spend more of their energy celebrating us rather than figuring out how to take control of our Facebook account. 

This can be a dark, morbid endeavor - or something liberating and motivating.  You get to choose.

Sunday Supper
If there is a better, more satisfying soup for someone working in their flower beds than Kapusniak, I don’t know what it is.  It carried Lori and I through much of the weekend.  On Sunday I’m going to grill a nice batch of basic cheeseburgers, topped with this sauce recipe from Gott’s Roadside in northern California.  Rather than incur the simple carbs from hamburger buns, I’m going to chop up some of the cheeseburgers, throwing them on top of a simple salad composed of shredded iceberg lettuce, diced yellow onion, tomatoes and pickles.  In addition to this cheeseburger salad improv, I’m going to make a nice batch of this Thai Basil Beef, with a pot of rice.  The leftovers will carry us deep into the week ahead.

Sunday Music
This duet between Justin Timberlake and Chris Stapleton of Stapleton’s Tennessee Whiskey and Timberlake’s Drink You Away is fun.  This performance of Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters by Elton John at the recent Gershwin Prize celebration is lovely.  This performance by Annie Lennox of Elton and Bernie Taupin’s Border Song is just wonderful, too.

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Table Stakes

We are nearly four weeks post-surgery for Nova’s knee, and she’s starting to feel frisky.  She now nags me regularly to go for walks, but I think it is just too soon to do much of that.  We have a FaceTime call scheduled with the surgeon soon.  I'm curious to hear what he has to say about ramping up her activity.

Unrelated, but worth sharing:  Fate forced me to change how I manage my email, and I’m pleasantly surprised with the result.  Hey.com offers wonderful innovations in both email and calendar interface.  On the email side, all first-time email senders are screened, giving you the power to reject all future emails from that sender.  This has drastically reduced my overall email volume, resulting in a surprising measure of peace of mind.

Yesterday I watched Food Inc. 2, a follow-up produced by Michael Pollan and Eric Schlosser that revisits the numerous issues in our system of food production and distribution that result in poor health, lower nutrition, exploitative labor practices and monopoly profits for the handful of mega-companies that sit atop key parts of the system.

I watched it reluctantly, to be honest.  Its uncomfortable to be reminded of the many ugly truths, especially when one feels powerless as an individual to affect meaningful change.  But my tail was dragging a bit, having received my second dose of the shingles vaccine on Friday.  Watching the film fit my energy level and I knew it would yield some good material to write about.

I won’t beat you over the head with all of the negative realities that we must navigate on a daily basis.  They are out there, and if you mindlessly buy and consume food, you will reinforce every single one of them.  I highly recommend watching the movie, to be a more-informed consumer.

Instead, I will share some simple guidelines that will allow you to “vote with your wallet” and support practices that yield more holistic benefits to all concerned:

• To the greatest extent possible, eat minimally processed food.  Fresh fruits and vegetables, canned or frozen are fine too.  Basic grains and legumes.  

• Purchase proteins that are ethically raised and processed.  No factory farmed meat, poultry or seafood.  This can cost more - offset that higher cost with more plant-based proteins.

• Buy local and seasonal as much as possible.  The outdoor farmer’s market opens soon - make sure to visit it often and purchase a lot of your food there.

The importance of cooking a home cannot be overstated.  To encourage this, my Sunday Supper recommendations moving forward are going to focus on easier-to-cook, more modular recipes to hopefully make it a bit easier for you to do this.  At the bottom of this email is a list of all the recipes I developed for the Maamos Kitchen meal kit program - email me if you would like any of those recipes, I’m happy to share them.  

On the personal health front, I continue to shed weight steadily, and I attribute this to cooking and eating more simply.  I’ll take the risk of jinxing myself by sharing that it really has been easy.  Its funny how the basic truths consistently yield results.  Eat more like your grandparents (maybe even great-grandparents)!  Your body will reward you with better health.

Sunday Supper
This One-Pot Chicken Tinga recipe will yield a lot of flavor and volume to jumpstart your week with good food.  This Kale Caesar Salad looks great, too - it would be easy to add some cooked chicken thighs or breast to this.  (My favorite local source of chicken is Copia Farm - their self-serve market stand is totally worth a visit if you haven’t been there yet.)

Sunday Music
This song came into my head earlier this week.  I tried to manufacture a reason for titling this week’s essay In Spite of Ourselves, but couldn’t figure it out.  This beautiful duet between John Prine and Iris Dement is so fun, poignant, and real.  When John died in 2020 of COVID-related complications, artists far and wide honored him by covering his songs in this NPR Tiny Desk (Home) concert tribute.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Totally Worth It

Many weeks ago one of my great friends from college texted to see if I wanted to join him in watching the eclipse.  He lives in Asheville, North Carolina now, but grew up in Centerville and still has family there.  He came back to Ohio to see his family and witness this rare event.

I blocked out the time on my calendar, but as the date approached I began to wonder whether I should make the trek to Wapakoneta.  The news reports indicated that there would be lots of traffic.  I was worried that I would endure a long slog there, only to discover that all the parking had been taken, and not be able to actually connect with my friend (and other friends from college who had joined in the fun).

Ultimately I decided to simply write the day off and go for it.  If it turned out to be an inefficient boondoggle, so be it.  How many more opportunities would I get to spend the day with these people?  Another eclipse in our region won’t occur until September 14, 2099.  I just committed to going, and was willing to accept whatever might happen.

Traffic on State Route 33 west out of Dublin was S L O W.  So slow that I contemplated abandoning the effort.  Was this going to be the slog I feared?  Traffic eventually opened up, though.  Cruising through Indian Lake, it was impossible not to see the destruction left behind by the recent tornado(s) that hit the area.  I’ve never seen trees damaged like that.

When I arrived at the Neil Armstrong Air & Space Museum, there was ample parking, and I was able to easily locate my friends.  We spent a wonderful few hours catching up, soaking up the sun, and making sophomoric jokes until the Moon started to creep in front of the Sun.  As the percentage of coverage got to nearly 100%, I was surprised by how much light we still had around us.  We enjoyed about four minutes of totality, where the Moon fully obscured the Sun and we were able to view it directly without glasses.  We marveled at the corona surrounding the Moon with its glorious halo.  It was truly awe-inspiring.  No wonder earlier humans freaked out when witnessing this amazing event in the past.

We waited about an hour for traffic to clear before we went our separate ways.  It took me nearly three hours to get home - a full hour more than normal traffic flow would require.  But it was totally worth it.

It made me wonder how many experiences we forgo out of fear.  Fear of discomfort, fear of being inconvenienced, fear that pursing something won’t live up to expectations.  So we do nothing instead, or stick to familiar activities.  The uncertainty actually adds to the payoff, when things go well.

I think I would benefit from a higher boondoggle ratio.  You might consider it, too.

Sunday Supper
FYI - I made all of the items I suggested for last week’s Sunday Supper.  Every last one of them.  It was a glorious Lebanese feast.  This week we’re jumping fully into Spring.  This Dairy-Free Creamy Asparagus Soup looks wonderful, as does this Risotto with Spring Peas, Ham and Fontina.  This Roasted Salmon with Ginger-Lime Butter also looks amazing.  For a sweet finish, this Double-Caramel Flan will do the trick.

Sunday Music
This Sunday I scanned my mind for voices I haven’t heard in a while, and landed on the truly lovely Lianne La Havas.  This NPR Tiny Desk (Home) Concert from the COVID era is just pure, stripped down, raw, beautiful talent.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Go-Givers

Welcome to Springtime.  After a busy week mostly spent getting to and returning from Atlanta, I regrouped a bit on Friday, then spent as much time as I could cleaning the yard up yesterday.  The front lawn received its first mowing of the year.  Thankfully the good folks at Wright Brothers Power got my leaf blower back into form (the coil was shot), so I could clear all the tree seeds, twigs and branches that last week’s storms deposited over everything.  I’ve never asked them whether they are related to the Wright Brothers of Dayton, Ohio…I’ll try to remember to check into this the next time I’m over on Church Street.

One of my friends used a term this week that has stuck with me:  Go-Givers.  They are like go-getters, but are more other-centered.  They think more about how they can be helpful to others.  There is a book titled The Go-Giver.  I haven’t read it, and can’t vouch for it.  But I find the term evocative.  Pro-actively helping others without a quid pro quo mindset is a good way to roll, in my opinion. 

It brings to mind the notion of karma.  In Indian and Buddhist traditions, karma refers to the principle of cause and effect - where both intent and actions influence the future.   When it comes to karma, it’s not enough to do a good deed - the intent behind the action matters, too.

One needn’t have a specific outcome in mind when doing something nice or helpful for others.  We’re wired for reciprocity.  If someone does a good turn for me, I’ll look for a way to do the same - for the person who was kind to me, or sometimes just for anyone.  The lesson of doing kindnesses is that it is more than enough to pay it forward to anyone, even strangers.  

A quote attributed to the American spiritual teacher, guru of modern yoga, psychologist and writer Ram Dass:  “We are all just walking each other home.”  I’m not sure I’ve seen a more succinct way of saying how I aspire to behave.  The universe is estimated to be about 13.7 billion years old.  The 90 to 100 years we all aspire to live are a blink of an eye when compared to this timescale.  We might as well be fruit flies.  Our time here is so brief.  Why not be kind, generous and helpful?

It’s interesting to observe how money and status can affect behavior.  We’ve all heard the term “F-You Money.”  If you won the $1.3 billion Powerball jackpot yesterday, how much would your behavior change?  Let’s assume that you could keep the windfall a secret.  No one is treating you differently.  How differently would you behave?  It’s an interesting thought experiment.

Compared to just two generations ago, I feel pretty close to being a Powerball winner.  My circumstances are quite different from those of my grandparents.  And I think Lori and I may have boosted our children into a slightly higher orbit.  That’s what humanity does - we all stand on the hard fought-lessons and accumulated blessings of those who came before us.

Sunday Supper
I made a bunch of this Chaat-Spiced Chex Mix for my friends this week, using 2 TBSP each of all three versions of Maanis Spice Blends.  It's super-easy and much more vibrant than the traditional Chex mix recipe.  With the weather warming up, I think we should light the grill and enjoy some Mediterranean food.  This Shish Tawook recipe is fantastic, as are these Kefta Kabobs.  Pairing these proteins with some Tabbouleh salad (I substitute quinoa for the bulgur wheat, for my Gluten Free Goddess (TM)) is a great idea.  And if the grill is lit, I gotta make some Baba Ganouj.  Make some, or all of these for a great Sunday feast.

Sunday Music
This Sunday my mind goes to Tom Waits. I consider him to be one of America’s greatest songwriters - right up there with Randy Newman, George Gershwin and Aaron Copland.  His deep, gravelly voice can sometimes overpower the beautiful melodies that underpin his music, so here I offer three different female artists covering Waits tunes:  Rachael Price (lead singer of Lake Street Dive), performing Take It With Me with Chris Thile on mandolin.  Madison Cunningham covering Hold On.  And the lovely Diane Krall performing Jockey Full of Bourbon at the Montreaux Jazz Festival in 2010.  To wrap it up, here is Waits himself debuting the song Take One Last Look, performed live on The Late Show With David Letterman, around the time of Letterman’s retirement.   Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Dreaming & Doing

Happy Easter, to those who celebrate!  The holiday hits differently in our home these days.  Long gone are the Easters where our little cherubs were dressed in dapper pastel-colored clothing, wandering the yard in pursuit of Easter eggs.  We have an old Hi8 video of one such Easter egg hunt, many years ago when my grandmother was still alive.  In it she cackles with excitement as people tell her “warmer” and “colder,” guiding her to the egg with her name on it.  I enjoy hearing the voices of loved ones no longer with us, but it does remind me how much our memories can fade over time.  It’s good to be able to refresh them with saved moments like this.  

Things are a little extra muted this week in our home because our dog Nova underwent TPLO knee surgery on Monday.  She is healing well, but still requires lots of quiet recovery here at home.  You won’t see us on our normal walks up and down Newark-Granville Road for a while.

Since it is the end of the first quarter of the year, I set aside some time this past week to reflect, and set goals for the next 90-day interval.  In the past, the demands of parenting and business just kind of pulled me along without an observation of a formal goal-setting ritual.  Today, I highly value this exercise.  In the absence of such a process, I probably would be wandering aimlessly.  Without slagging the past, I am grateful for this present mode of operating.  I like the sense of agency that it creates in me.

Having a clear, compelling vision of the future helps me fill the void of empty nester hood with purposeful action.  Cameron Herold calls this a “Vivid Vision.”  A bright, detailed picture of the future of your own creation that provides inspiration.  It serves as a great catalyst that alters my day-to-day behavior.  Those daily actions create micro results that add up over time (the point of last weeks essay).  There is a somewhat spooky mechanism at play here - the more detailed and compelling one’s vision is, the more likely it will change our behavior, increasing the chances of it becoming our new reality.

I find myself resisting the term “manifesting,” because it feels a bit woo-woo.  Yet, there is something to this term.  Self-fulfilling prophecies happen, and we can activate this mechanism to our benefit, at least sometimes.

I do recognize what a luxury it is to be able to take time for reflection and develop a bright, vibrant picture of the future that spurs me to action.  Someone with two kids, no spouse, working three jobs would be hard-pressed to pull this off.  Even with a spouse and just one job, I often didn’t.  On the other end of the spectrum, those of us who have achieved a higher degree of financial independence have ample time to dream about the future, get excited by these dreams and take decisive action.  The paradoxical nature of this may be disappointing, but it’s unavoidable math - the value of both money and time compounds.

Another observation I have made about this whole notion of goal setting - it can be counter-productive if one becomes too fixated on their vision.  It’s like the awesome power of the Sun - it is best to let it illuminate your path, but if you stare at it, it will blind you.  While I am personally seeing the immense value of getting into that detailed, future-focused head space, I also recognize the risk of staying there, never translating the vision into present-day action steps that carry me forward.  A patient focus on process will likely deliver the desired outcome.  Perhaps not on the desired schedule, but we can get there eventually by staying persistent. 

It’s a dance, a dynamic back-and-forth.  We have to create that whitespace where we can dream in detail about the future.  AND THEN we have to put the blinders on, hitch up the plow and get to work on the small daily actions that will carry us toward that destination.  If you can, I encourage you to put on your dancing shoes and give this a try.

Here’s to a productive Spring.

Sunday Supper
I’m keeping things simple this weekend.  Lori and I will be getting some smoked ham from Ray Ray’s for Easter, along with some sides.  Many people have Easter meal plans, I imagine.  So I’ll offer up this Grilled Bratwurst, Beer & Cheddar Soupas a counterpoint.  Maybe whip this up on Monday to start the week.  It reminds me of some wonderful house-made pretzels and beer cheese sauce that I enjoyed with a friend at the now-closed Boxcar Restaurant in Avon, Colorado a few years back.

Sunday Music
This Sunday I share a live performance by a great musician who you most likely know, but who I think you will agree stays out of the limelight these days.  I give you this wonderful performance by the inimitable Harry Connick, Jr.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

Radical Consistency

Friday night Lori and I had the pleasure of dining with friends at the Columbus fine dining institution, The Refectory.  We had only been there one time previously, many years ago.  It was a group event, with a set menu.  So I didn’t feel like we had ever had the “full” experience.  It would be easy to assume that a French restaurant that has been around since the late 1970s might be a bit stodgy or dated, but nothing could be further from the truth.  It has clearly evolved with the times, offering a range of ways to enjoy their cuisine without breaking the bank account, and delivering a truly enjoyable experience - thanks in part to their amazing wine cellar and great sommelier, Taylor Wolf.

Owner Kamal Boulos started working for the restaurant under prior ownership in 1976, eventually purchasing it in 1991.  His steady presence in the front-of-house all these years, combined with the 30+ year tenure of chef Richard Blondin have built a rock solid foundation of consistent excellence that is second to none.

The restaurant is a study in consistency.  Many entrepreneurs are highly creative and easily distractible - chasing the latest bright, shiny objects and often drifting from their Core Focus.  Not so with the leadership of The Refectory.

I have experienced the benefits of consistency personally with regard to dieting this year.  With just one week to go in the first quarter of the year, I have lost a little weight each and every week - except for this past week - which has nothing to do with our visit to The Refectory (my weigh-in was prior to this).  I’m down 14 pounds since the first week of January, and I intend to keep going.

I won’t get into the details regarding what my protocol is, except to say it is super basic - but something I observe it each and every day.  In addition to building my confidence and giving me a stronger sense of agency, I’ve experienced other benefits, all of which are tied to this change in eating - better sleep, more consistent energy throughout the day, and a higher degree of focus as I work.  I feel good physically, and it feels like I am living each day more in line with all of my priorities.  The year is off to a great start.

This somewhat magical feeling, when improvement in one area of life leads to unexpected halo benefits in other areas - this same mechanism applies to many different things.  Better diet leads to better sleep.  Better sleep leads to better daily energy.  Better daily energy leads better daily focus.  Better daily focus leads to better parenting and decision making, impulse control, etc. - creating a positive virtuous cycle that can be very powerful.

Abraham Lincoln is quoted as having said “I walk slowly, but I never walk backwards.”  It speaks to the ratchet effect of capturing and preserving improvements, however small - not giving them away, but adding to them as much as we can.  Some days are successful simply because you held your ground.  I picked up a couple of pounds in the last week, but I promise you the numbers will go the other way, in spite of the amazing meal we enjoyed Friday night.  I may not wipe away the entire weight gain in one week, but things will move in the desired direction.  I promise.

Go to The Refectory, the next chance you get!  I can’t imagine anyone not loving it.  And think about what cornerstone behavior you can improve on that might create a virtuous cycle in your life.  It can happen!

Sunday Supper
This Roast Pork with Jalapeño Gravy looks lovely.  I’ll be making this today, along with a sheet pan of Crispy Roasted Potatoes and this Roasted Root Vegetable Salad with Sweet Lime Dressing.

Sunday Music
This week I discovered Jacob Collier by way of Chris Thile’s Instagram feed.  Here is a trio performance by Thile, Collier and Madison Cunningham that is just beautiful.  And here is a full 2-hour performance by Collier in Lisbon, Spain, 2022.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,

White Space

An article in The Wall Street Journal really spoke to me this week - These Professionals Aren’t Retired, They Just Have Zero To Prove (this is a free link, so you can read it yourself).  It describes a number of very successful people who are embracing  a “post achievement” lifestyle with family, health and passion projects taking priority over corporate ladder climbing.

The article quotes 44-year old Rachel Barak, co-founder of the marketing firm Said Differently as saying “A lot of serial entrepreneurs are scared of the white space in their lives, and I’m really excited by that white space.”  I share Rachel’s excitement.  Entrepreneurs might create such white space when they sell their businesses, or leave high-flying corporate positions - but it can be created by other life events. 

The kids leaving for college and the passing of my mom created such a space in my life, which I’ve been navigating for the past couple of years.  Embracing my creativity has been important.  Reading, writing and talking to lots of great people have been immensely helpful in figuring out how to realize the potential represented by the white space.  Volunteering has also been informative, and now occupies a dedicated position in my weekly routine.

Late last year I decided what I am going to focus on during this next phase of life.  In addition to maintaining my media buying practice for key long-term clients, I am adding the role of Entrepreneur Coach to my repertoire.  Actually, the term used by the organization I am affiliated with is called Professional EOS Implementer.

EOS stands for Entrepreneurial Operating System, and was developed by a great fellow named Gino Wickman.  A long-time entrepreneur, Gino saw the need to simplify the complexity that many entrepreneurs are surrounded by, and assembled a comprehensive set of simple tools to help them and their leadership teams achieve more of their goals.

After talking with both my inner circle of close friends, and interviewing numerous EOS Implementers across North America, I determined that this would be an excellent way for me to contribute to the world and leverage my twenty-five years’ experience as an entrepreneur.  I self-implemented EOS in Maamos Kitchen, and know numerous people who have done the same in their businesses, to great effect.

One of the keys to EOS’ success is that it requires entrepreneurs and their leadership teams to create white space for themselves - going offsite about five days each year to reaffirm their vision for the future, getting on the same page regarding how they are going to create that future via a series of 90-day sprints.  If you consider that there are 52 weeks each year, a business that operates Monday - Friday has 260 days to get things done.  Taking 5 of them to work on the business (instead of in it), heavily focuses the way they use their precious time and energy during the other 255.  Basically a 2% time investment into planning and goal-setting amplifies the impact of the other 98%.

When all is said and done, achieving different outcomes requires different behaviors - whether it’s personal or organizational.  EOS is all about breaking down those goals into clear action steps that carry us in the right direction.  I’ve seen the compounding effects of steady, modest change - and I’m looking forward to helping entrepreneurs and their leadership teams create this momentum in their lives.

There’s nothing magical about it - we all can become more intentional about what we’re doing, and why.  Stepping out of the day-to-day current of life, creating some white space to think and dream is a great way to ensure that you make the most of this precious time we have here on Earth.

Sunday Supper
This being St. Patrick’s Day weekend, I must suggest this Oven-Braised Guiness Beef Stew w/ Horseradish Cream.  These Grasshopper Brownies would be a good finish, in the style of McDonalds’ Shamrock Shakes.

Sunday Music
Aoife O’Donovan’s name is so darned Irish.  So I have to share this recent beautiful performance of her song All My Friends.  And for a longer Sunday listen, here is the group Carrtoons’ recent live performance at NPR’s Tiny Desk.  Enjoy!

If you know anyone who might like this essay, please send it to them. 

Have a great week ahead!  Offer support to others.  Make good use of this day.  And let me know how I can help.

Peace & Love,